friends forever??

I'm not happy. Almost feeling hurt. Am I being forgotten? Will u be like her someday? U almost act like her recently, juz not that much. I hope u won't.

Or is it juz me. Maybe I feel jealous. Yeah, maybe a little. I really hate that feeling. It's like tearing me apart. I hate it. In the inside I wanna be like you, like them. But I know, it'll juz make everyone laugh.

Half of it, maybe I was being influence. I'm easily being influence, u know. I dunno what am I thinking until I really calm down and think properly what's going on. That's why i always regret with my action. I dunno where I'm really standing at. I better juz keep quiet next time, or I'll regret again.A better way, juz ignore whatever i say.

Or am I hot tempered? I know it isn't a thing to be mad at. But when come to think of it. It feels hurt sometimes. But i dunno the whole story, so i can't say anything. But, it does break my heart when i saw the photos.

I don't want u to be like her. She's good. But not in something else. I juz wan the old u.

I'm being selfish. I know. I should listen to what steph said. If it's a life u want. Juz go on. I can't force u not to. To be honest, i want ur life too. But i think i could only maintain the life i have now. Maybe is better for me. Maybe that's what god wants me to.
I'll know the new you again next year. I'll have a chance. Sorry that i feel not wanting to accept you before this. I'll know u all again and accept the way you are. I hope that we can be besties again. Friends forever, girl...=)

I feel free now, after posting this post. At least i know, that's what i want for myself, for now...